Friday, March 21, 2008

March 21, 2008
2
You ever wondered why troll feet are naked? Sure taurens are also, but they are cows, it makes sense that they don't actually need boots. Troll feet are naked, and we can run over hot lava, sharp stones and icky swamp like any other race.

Q: Maybe our feet are too big for boots?
A: Then make bigger boots.

Q: Perhaps Trolls love the feel of sand between their toes?
A: Sand maybe, but hot lava, sharp stones and that swamp goo surely isn't.

Q: Perhaps it's for that "in touch with nature" feeling?
A: If that were the case, we'd be able to make druids.

Q: Maybe Troll feet are more stealthy than any boot with soles?
A: Then why don't we have a racial like night elves? And surely the padding of boots like The master's treads are more stealthy.

Q: Perhaps Troll feet produce such a horrifying stench when they are kept inside boots that they all decided not to wear them?
A: OK, now this i can agree on.


Awesome

Trolls are also more awesome than you, even without boots.
I can point you to this post on the wow forums which is pretty funny. I'll quote some parts, in case time deletes it.

* If two Trolls cheer at the same time anywhere in the world, the world shakes twice and the ground where the two shakes meet spawns Skittles Rainbows.
** If two Trolls cheer at the same time in the same place, that entire area will be showered in Skittles.
** If two Trolls cheer at the same time in the same place at each other, they both explode into Skittles. There was clearly too much awesome in that one area.

* Trolls don't wear shoes.
** If a Troll wore shoes, the ground he walked on would burn forever. Water can't put this fire out. It can't rain either. To prevent global warming, Trolls do their part by not wearing shoes.
** They wear shinguards instead. It makes them really good at soccer. Refs can't give them red flags at all. Its like against the rules.

* When a male troll flexes, a female of any race has a 3.48% chance to orgasm randomly. Anywhere, anytime.
* When a female troll flexes, a guy will get a boner. Same percentage etc.

* If trolls were druids they wouldn't need to shift into bear form. Their mohawks would show in all animal forms, including aquatic.


Azeroth is very Troll unfriendly

When walking upright, Trolls are the tallest race in Azeroth.
But, due to doors everywhere being too low, and our ancestors constantly hitting their head we started walking bent.

Everywhere, you kill our brothers and family !
In the hinterlands, in Zul'Aman and the Ghostlands, in Zul'Gurub and Stranglethorn, in Zul'Farrak and Tanaris. In Dun moroch, Sunken Temple and the Eastern Plague lands.

The only place you haven't gone killing us yet is in the current day Hyjal. I don't doubt there will come a day where even there we will be pursued.

You even name the biggest forum retards after us, why?! What have trolls ever done to receive such resentment? No respect these days for your elder races.


Also interesting

Have you ever heard of this? It's not really a new technology, but still pretty cool if it can be more widely utilized into computers. What? It's a replacement for the default fans you have inside your computer or on top of your CPU. It produces less (no) sound, cools more efficiently, uses less power and doesn't attract nearly as much dust as regular components do. Quite interesting no?


Aszune weekly

This is a fanmade e-zine originating from the Aszune forums. It's a kind of newspaper for the aszune realm. Perhaps interesting to check out.

Download :
* Week 1
* Week 2
* Week 3


Comics

Just one today, but i guarantee you it's fun as heck.
It's called Factual authentic real true stories (farts). Go check it out.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Awww... now I miss playing my boy trolls. They are so much fun!

Anonymous said...

A: If that were the case, we'd be able to make druids.

Wish granted.